


Paint It Black

by TheFightingBull



Series: My Song Fics [4]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, Under the Red Hood
Genre: Angst, Gen, No Slash, Not Beta Read, Robin's Death Aftermath, Typos, dealing with grief, if they are really bad let me know and I'll fix it, lots of swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-08
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:21:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22621696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFightingBull/pseuds/TheFightingBull
Summary: Harvey is struggling with the fact that no one seems to believe or maybe even care that the second Robin has died. Part of my Rise of The Red Hood series and My Song Fic series.
Relationships: Jason Todd & Harvey Bullock, Robin & Harvey Bullock, not sexual - Relationship
Series: My Song Fics [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1535615
Comments: 6
Kudos: 61





	Paint It Black

**Author's Note:**

> Today is not a good day. At all. My own personal grief is eating me alive and I wrote this to try and get rid of it. If it sucks, I'm sorry.

Harvey Bullock is pissed. But more than pissed, he’s hurt. He’s… He’s fucking devastated. He hates the capes, hates them with a burning passion that he doesn’t think will ever fade. Hates every one of them save for Robin. Or at least, the one that’s been running the streets for the past three years.

The Robin that saved his life.

The Robin that was his friend.

The Robin that has become his little brother.

Robin has been dead for at least two weeks. No one’s said a thing. No one’s offered a kind word about the kid. Not even Batman. Harvey wants… He needs someone to say it. Someone to acknowledge it. He needs the entire town painted fucking black in the same despair that he’s feeling day in and day out.

He loved that kid. Loved laughing with him. Loved listening to him bitch about Batman. Loved having a smoke break with him. Loved teasing him about how small he was. Loved knowing that when they teased each other, it was there way of saying they knew.

They _knew_.

Harvey’s an only child, but his dad was a piece of work. He didn’t grow up in Crime Alley as the second Robin so obviously did, but his old man was just as violent and cruel and Robin’s had been. They were both trying to live down their troubled pasts. They were both protectors of the city.

Looking at his fellow detectives he’s undone by the sight. They’re laughing. Actually laughing. As if someone hadn’t died. As if a child hasn’t disappeared and Harvey despises them for it! How dare they live their lives as if the sweetest kid Crime Alley had ever known wasn’t dead and gone.

“Harvey?” Jim Gordon is calling his name but he can’t face the man.

Jim Gordon is Batman’s friend. Jim Gordon _knows_ Robin is dead. But not once has Jim spoken to him. Not once as he offered a kind word over the little shit’s death and Harvey’s not sure if he can take one more minute in the precinct.

“…probably got himself grounded. What was he twelve?” Another officer is laughing as she and her partner pass him.

“What the fuck did you just say?” Harvey demands, ignoring Jim’s request for him to calm down.

“Since when do you care about capes?” Officer Stanley demands with her partner stepping up beside her. “Wasn’t it you said they could go take a flying leap off the clock tower?”

“You know what, Stanley, just shut the fuck up about him.” Harvey growls. “You don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about!”

“Bullock!” Jim shouts.

“No, you know what. Fuck all of you. That kid’s dead. He fucking died and the Batman’s too chicken shit to tell everyone he finally got one his little side-kicks killed.”

There’s silence for several long moments around their desks. And then laughter erupts.

“Batman wouldn’t let anything happen to Robin,” Stanley rolls her eyes.

“Yeah, he would have reported it, too,” her partner, Miles?, adds.

Harvey turns of them all and heads outside. Fuck them all.

“What’s the matter, can’t fuck the kid behind the dumpsters anymore?”

He stops and looks at the man who spoke. Officer Martinez, according to his badge, is a beat cop, someone Harvey doesn’t recognize. It doesn’t matter. Harvey knocks the man on his ass with a solid punch to the punk’s laughing jaw.

“Harvey!” Jim shouts again.

He keeps walking out of the building, grumbling curses to himself. The Batman knew Robin was his friend. Jim knew Robin was his friend. Why haven’t they come to speak with him? Why haven’t they said a single fucking word to him.

He pulls out a cigarette, hoping against everything that he is that it will rouse Robin from some secret hiding place. That the boy wonder will show up, asking to bum a smoke with his crooked grin. When Harvey denies him, Robin will put out his own pack and laugh about not needing to rely on him for his nasty habit.

“Harv?” He glares at the sidewalk instead of looking at Jim.

The man leans against the side of the building beside Harvey and sighs. “What is going on with you.”

“He’s dead, he’s dead and this entire fucking city is going on without him,” He says as calmly as he can after taking a drag. “That boy saved my life. Saved yours, too. But no one cares. No one mourns. Everyone’s laughing and joking about their lives. They’re completely unaware of what our city lost…”

“There’s no proof that Rob—”

“Oh, go blow that smoke up someone else’s ass, Gordon!” Harvey snaps and takes another drag. “You know damned well he’s dead. Batman told you he was and don’t even bother to deny it.”

Gordon’s shoulders drop. “Announcing his death might lead to someone figuring out their identity.”

Harvey quickly wipes away the tears that threaten to fall. It’s all the confirmation he never knew he needed that his theories weren’t just theories. He shakes his head and inhales deeply off the filter of his cigarette.

Burn, burn, burn. Burn his lungs so he can’t feel it.

“I never knew you cared so much?” Jim says softly.

“Kid stalked me for the past three years,” Harvey admits. “He was… It was like I… I just let him in, Gordon. I let him in and now he’s gone…

“Stupid Punk…

“Dumb shit probably went and…” He breaks down and drops his cigarette. “He couldn’t have been more than fifteen, Gordon… It’s not fair. He’s gone and everyone just acts like everything is okay.”

“Because it is,” Gordon adds roughly as he runs his hand through his graying hair. “For them it _is_ okay. You can’t expect the world to mourn with you, Harvey. No matter how much we want it.”

“I want it painted black,” Harvey laughs. He can’t help it. Kid loved all that old rock music, and, in this moment, he’s never connected more with a song in his life. “Paint it black, black as night. Black as coal.”

When Bullock sits on the sidewalk and leans against the building, Gordon joins him. “I know you do, Harv. I know you do.”

**Author's Note:**

> Paint It Black by Ciara  
> (Originally by The Rolling Stones)
> 
> I see your red door, I want it painted black  
> No colors any more, I want them to turn black  
> I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes  
> I have to turn my head until my darkness goes  
> I see the line of cars and they're all painted black  
> With flowers and my love, both never to come back  
> I see people turn their heads and quickly looked away  
> Like a newborn baby it just happens everyday  
> I look inside myself and see my heart is black  
> I see my red door, I must have it painted black  
> Maybe then I'll fade away and not have to face the facts  
> It's not easy facing up when your whole world is black  
> No more will my green sea go turn a deeper blue  
> I could not foresee this thing happening to you  
> If I look hard enough into the setting sun  
> My love will laugh with me before the morning comes  
> (I want to see your face painted black  
> Black as night, black as coal  
> See the sun blotted out from the sky)  
> I've seen your red door and I want it painted black  
> No colours any more, I want them to turn black  
> I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes  
> I have to turn my head until my darkness goes


End file.
